THE LOST TAPES Vol.36

For so long I’ve waited
For what I thought was the right moment
To check on you, talk to you
Show you I have changed
Not the person I once was
But different, better,
with a new view of this new world
I wanted to love you again
and maybe get from you any kind of affection
Thinking twice, thrice, on what to say next
Spent the whole afternoon practicing a conversation
But you stopped me before I had the chance
And now what?
What can I do?
Am I really that unlikable
to not even deserve a second chance? 

***

maybe just show off pinky ring maybe
accept and be proud of my fate as a maiden 

***

baphomet printed on large black tee
protestant woman in her jeans skirt
don’t even look at me
when I say “good morning” 

***

Winter is coming
The neighborhood committee
Began to dress stray dogs
In cozy coats 

***

The trio walks down the avenue
Colored hair, short hair, puny accents on broken English
Skateboards and jean jackets; buttons, patches and heavy make-up
Grandma’s got face tats, walking behind them
Escorts the girls to the music store 

***

BBW
Beautiful flowery dress
Beautiful shiny gold watch
Wonderful orchid adorning her hair
Can’t stop talking — in a whiny voice — about herself 

***

if I vanish for a few days, don’t worry
maybe I’m just taking some time for myself
many problems not mine piling upon my back
so demanding, sorry for not being enough 

***

group of kids 10-14 years old
talk about buying fake air jordans
and passing out drunk at parties
Ten years have passed
and the cool kidz stayed just as bad 

***

   Curious faces, within dirty jams and boogaloo
   Same size, same shape
   Lucy, Satan’s daughters
   Calid color, destroy my coolness 

***

   A normal response as moan in the intimate
   To the fear of what’s far beyond
   Anticipation of death in the future
   Sight of death herself right now
   Though despair, astonishment
   Marvellous view of the knight in shining armor
   Come as saviour, messiah of the world under
   To rescue from the high tower up above
   Bring back to dust and into shadows
   A beautiful destiny in infinity

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Untitled 04

Hi Hello How are you feeling today? Not much. What about you? I’m here. Yes, you are. Yep. I am. Why are you here? Do I need a reason? (How does one fill the silence that follows?) ***    I remember that afternoon. That strange afternoon when you told me to shut up, to not be a bitch, and I was too overwhelmed by my own feelings to see that you were crying too. To be fair, you were doing the dishes, I could only see your back every time I opened my eyes, through the blurry haze of painful tears. The sweat got into my eyes, and you know how it hurts when you just finish a coat of sunscreen and sweat get into your eyes, right? Double-pain, mourn on the necrotic-narcotic, you knew my friend had died just last night. I know you know that ‘cause he was your friend too. You got his cool Merzbow collection, and said it’s ours, you said I could take the first run 1996 Pulse Demon used CD with me after we listened to it together. You know how to cheer me up, how to make me smile t...
Read more

home at last

   We arrive, finally, at the building’s front door. Out of the car and barely able to stay on my feet I sit on the sidewalk, back to the wall, waiting for Priscilla to find the keys amongst the mess in her backpack.     “You know what just came to mind?” I ask.     “That you are way too hungry to be spending this much time looking for keys and we should just crash at the dumpster tonight for christ’s sake? Maybe order some pizza?” She replied, clearly fed up to give a shit but doing her best not to break my heart.    But I was too numb to care, and responded,     “No, I was thinking about Bovary. Did you feed her this week?”     “Of course I did, what? If I didn’t papa would come back to life and beat my ass. He loves these fucking cats more than me.”     She finds the keys after a while, but not before the manager comes down to check what was going on and open the door for us.      Today was one ...
Read more

an "ode" to all my friends

old friends everywhere, waves, nods, ‘mornings to sit down at the empty café and hear the latest gossip or even feel the sweat pooling on my back for I still insist in wearing these heavy clothes even mid-summer this time sat on one of my benches, in one of my parks looking at all the city pricks passing by at all the traffic outside the gate at all the gray in this world wild concrete world, house to all that’s modern, to all that’s me even me not being all that modern a den made to fit me like a buff man’s pinky ring and also all of my friends, mineral, vegetal, animal like that big rock you find driving out of town for a bit or the pothead homeless that knows my name, rocking a 100$ bong or even, and would you look at that, the handful of people with an active role in my life chatters, lovers, friends and foes the kids, the teens, the adults, the olds a cheer from the poor homeless at the shelter a group hug from the children at the orphanage a couple handshakes and smiles at the nu...
Read more